aesc: (umbrella on a sunny day)
aesc ([personal profile] aesc) wrote2012-12-28 09:02 pm

surfacing

[combination of two posts from LJ since I'm an idiot who can't make Semagic work]

Well, it's a year later and I feel like a shit friend. Things got to the point where I'd been away so long, and it felt like it would be weird and uncomfortable beyond words to go back when everything's changed and people have moved on, and I would be stuck trying to get back the friends and conversations I should never have given up in the first place. It's one of the things crippling depression does to you, but it still feels like a very bad excuse.

The past 365+ days have been very eventful. I got an actual job that pays real money (in my field, more or less) and moved from my very tiny town to a very big city. My depression still lurks, but I've been busy enough that I can avoid thinking about it. In my work capacity I got to see siriaeve and torment her for a few days, which I haven't done in a very long time. One of the hardest things I've had to do this year is leave Finn behind, because he would not be happy as a big city dog, stuck in a tiny apartment when he could have a big house and a yard and his best friend for company. At the moment I'm home on winter break and I've been taking many pictures of him and forcibly cuddling him.

Part of me wants to come back, but it's just very weird, seeing as I basically exiled myself. Tumblr alarms me. I'm casually writing (and should be finishing) XMFC fic, although I'm also still trying to catch up from not being able to write for three months, thanks to severe repetitive strain that has (for the moment) been subdued by wrist braces and steroid shots in my elbows. But god it sucks when you write for a living and can't write... and then remember that, once you've fallen behind on writing, you will never in a million years be able to catch up.

I decided to go ahead and get myself a Tumblr (again). It's got one whole entry and you can look at it here. What I'm going to do with it, I have no idea, but feel free to friend/follow/whatever.

The reason my URL is theletteraesc is that some jerk just took 'aesc' and has done nothing with it. And may I just say, I find that incredibly irritating, considering that I'm aesc everywhere else in fandomland.
kass: Eleven and Amy hug. (hug)

[personal profile] kass 2012-12-29 02:35 am (UTC)(link)
Hi hi! It's so good to see you. One of the awesome things about fandom is that we're pretty much always here & ready to hang out again -- no apologies needed.

I'm glad for the new job. Sorry you had to leave Finn behind. And sorry that depression still plagues you. It is no fun at all, at all.

I send love! I'm not on tumblr (yet, maybe, I dunno) but I'm happy to see you here!
cathexys: XMFC: Charles and Erik on Lincoln Memorial steps (charles/erik (by megan moonlight))

[personal profile] cathexys 2012-12-29 03:57 am (UTC)(link)
What kass said :) We all come and go infrequently. Even if one doesn't gafiate, maybe fandoms are at crosspurposes or interests diverge for a bit. But at the end, all of us are still here, happy to see you back.

In fact, we just had a small journal revolution, where a bunch of us who like the written word a bit too much and can't engage on tumblr or twitter quite as we want to have been purposefully coming back here.

yeah on the job. congrats!!!

Very nice to see you back and still in XMFC...whether just for a bit or for good again...

<3
mrkinch: James holding a white tea mug (tea too)

[personal profile] mrkinch 2012-12-29 02:53 am (UTC)(link)
All right!

(Dreamwidth makes it extremely easy to cross-post an entry composed in DW, far easier than Semagic, which I used to use when I was on less friendly platforms (LJ and IJ). I know that that would be a step too far for many people, though.*hugs*)
icarus: Snape by mysterious artist (Default)

[personal profile] icarus 2012-12-29 07:01 am (UTC)(link)
I can't spend more than a few minutes in Tumblr before my eyes hurt and I have to backbutton. Twitter's the same (though I use it because some of my Buddhist teachers are Tweeting).

Good to see I'm not alone.
calvinahobbes: Calvin looking out from behind a wall (calvinlurkwall)

[personal profile] calvinahobbes 2012-12-29 02:01 pm (UTC)(link)
Hello! (I think I started following you back in SGA days.) I just wanted to say that I hope you don't feel out of fannish sorts for long -- I find DW a very welcoming space, full of people who are ready to respond to your thinky thoughts or your squee.

It might be a bit much to take in first thing, but [personal profile] kouredios just recently hosted a huge friending meme (the one cathexys mentioned above) -- Being the change I want to see in my f-list. It proves people are still very much hanging out on the journal platforms and are completely open to engaging with new people (or reengaging, I'm sure).