aesc | OMGWTF DAY

Seriously, today is OMGWTF Day.

I lost my keys (AGAIN! This is the second time this year) at a very large place where things are not easily found. Not only did I lose my keys, but 1.) my cell phone was dead, and 2.) my roommate is out of town, so even if I did have a functional cell phone, it would be pointless. Also, today it was about a billion degrees out.

Fortunately, after about an hour of waiting for a locksmith who never showed up (who would have shown up so I could pay him to see that my keys were, in fact, not in my car) I was able to borrow a cell phone to call a neighbor who got into our house, got the spare keys, and drove over to give them to me. I was as grateful as heatstroke (because I had to wait by my car, having no cell phone) allowed me to be under the circumstances.

Now I am sunburned and sticky, and I have a heat headache and cheese that is half-melted. I also have a goddamn huge river of pee in the kitchen (thank you, cowardly dog) and a chair with one arm completely savaged (FINN). I now hate Indiana, I hate this house, I hate summer, I found out today my committee has disintegrated and disappeared (oh, you're in England for the summer? THANK YOU FOR TELLING ME WTF), and I still don't have a bucket (the original point of the errand) because the store I went to did not have them and I couldn't make myself drive somewhere else to find one.

The only thing that will satisfy me right now is blood. I don't care whose it is, but I want it.

Threaded | Flat

*hands you some aloe and a very large glass of iced tea*

Oh, panda! *pets you gently*

::pets very carefully::

I'm so sorry. Heat just makes everything worse, doesn't it? A tepid shower or bath might be a good idea. And of course, liquids. Served to you by a sweaty John Sheppard wearing a snug tee-shirt and saggy shorts. Very saggy shorts. The kind where you can see just a hint of hipbone.

I always felt that the most challenging aspect of grad school was getting your entire committee in the same room at the same time. You should be able to get a degree just for that achievement alone.

I'm in England, want me to corral your committee for you?

*jabs at them with knitting needles*

*offers you dorky boys*
(http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v124/lothluin2/?action=view&current=311_23.jpg)

baby panda rodney concedes that your day was way worse than his and offers you this tasty bit of bamboo.

Weird, you are the second person I've heard from to-day asking for blood.

...*nervously offers you neck*

*opens vein*

yeah, half my committee (they are two) is not giving me the address I need to send my draft to him so he can comment on it. He's been on my committee for over a year, I sent material to him 3 times, and he has not uttered one remark or comment yet. He sent me two pieces of email in 18 months, one of them last week clearly a mistake of some kind: the email was entirely blank. no subject line, no content, no signature, nothing. best kind of e-freudian slip I've ever seen.

*shares, um, mexican candy*

That is an impressively bad day.

*offers air conditioning and cold water served by Rodney while John cleans up your house*

:(((

*hugs you tightly, carefully avoiding sunburn*

I think it's the day.

*hugs you gingerly*

Would you like storytime? I can do storytime. Are you online?

Sends John over to make Bloody Marys and Rodney to *gently* rub aloe all over your burn. (He's promised not to scold you for going outside without sunblock.) If you play your cards right, you might get a foot rub -- and other concessions -- out of the deal...

Been there, done that. The worst time was when I locked the car door with the keys inside and my 2 year old nephew in the car. I just automatically lock the door without thinking about it and was talking to someone outside the car. We had to call the fire department. (facepalm) One other time I was at a fast food place and had called AAA, when some guy came over and said he used to steal cars when he was much younger and popped the lock open within 5 seconds of touching the car. My solution is that I always carry an extra set of keys in my purse, which only works if I don't lock the purse in the car...

Have some ice tea, put your feet up and read some good fanfic.

Jeez, and it's not even Friday the 13th there yet, is it? Way to jump the gun, kiddo!

Perhaps we could shed the blood of those fundamentalists who want to turn America into some idealized version of the 1950's that never actually existed except in their minds?

You poor, poor thing! What a terrifically horrible sort of day. I'm sending John your way with aloe.

Also, have a sweet little pig...in miniature galoshes! (It can be Rodney? Because the mud? Oh, the mud!)

(http://s5.photobucket.com/albums/y166/kimberweeme/?action=view&current=piginboots.jpg)

Oh honey, what a shitty day! I had Adventures at the Dentist, which involved drugs, panic attacks and half broken teeth, crappy day all round!

Some days are just meant to end quickly with the lounge, the tv, a computer and a dog curled up with you, that's the best part of a crappy day.

What a craptastic day for you. *offers iced tea and John and Rodney to draw you a soothing bath with aloe*

I offer cute piggies, too!

Oh, dear.

Drink lots of milk to help the burn.

*offers artery*